Boo hoo. Krazee mom Kate Gosselin got herself canceled. After 150 episodes, TLC has finally pulled the plug on the child-exploitation show. I’ve never seen an episode, I’m pleased to say, but that hasn’t kept the Gosselin off my radar. She’s invaded my US Weekly and E! News. So of course, I feel entirely comfortable giving Bad Hair Kate some career advice. Here are 15 career options for our newly unemployed uber-mom.
1) Open a day care facility and employ all your former nannies you’ve scared off over the years.
2) Get on VH1s Famous Food.
3) Become a national spokesperson for hand sanitizer (If Kris Jenner can do it for Poise pads, Kate can do it for hand sanitizer).
4) Open a tanning/nail salon.
5) Take acting classes.
6) Become a hairstylist. Specializing in the Kate spike.
7) Go to work on Lifetime’s Dance Moms teaching that horrifying dance to Lady Gaga’s “Paparazzi” that she did on DWTS.
08) Become a singer, ala every Real Housewife in the franchise.
9) Become the next Bachelorette and/or appear on the next Bachelor.
10) Take over Divorce Court (is that show still on? Apparently so.)
11) Rent out that silver fox bodyguard.
12) Two words: Marriage counselor.
13) Join Steven Seagal’s Law Man.
14) Start her own Twitter and Facebook campaign to get her show back.
15) Team up with Octomom and take over the world.
The Kate spike. I love it.