Crap. So I actually heard about this story yesterday morning while I was getting ready for work. But then, I got distracted by armadillos coming to DC. Because if anything can distract me from fears of my impending death, it’s a cute armadillo.
A woman from Australia died in a New York helicopter crash. I know what you’re thinking, “Poe, what does that have to do with you?” Well, let me tell you.
Exhibit A: This woman was from Australia. We’re going to Australia next year.
Exhibit B: This woman flew half-way across the globe to celebrate her 40th birthday. We’re going to Australia to celebrate my 40th birthday.
Exhibit C: This woman was on a helicopter tour purchased by her partner-in-life. My partner-in-life XFE insists that this is a “gift.”
Exhibit D: This woman was terrified of flying. I’m terrified of being suspended in the air with nothing underfoot. And falling. Very terrified of falling.
Exhibit E: This woman has been described as a “personality and a half,” and “a tough-as-nails, hardworking woman with a heart of gold.” I’ve been described in decidedly less glowing terms, but similar sentiments, with saltier language.
Exhibit F: This woman used to own a bar called Madame Fling Flong on a King St. We live near a King St. and I would definitely drink at a bar called Madame Fling Flong.
So as you can clearly see, I’m in danger. The parallels are UNCANNY. Basically, I’m worried about some sort of travel karma. Australia, the country, is going to kill me in some sort of blood payment for this poor woman dying on U.S. soil.
Just remember, I posted it here first. Australia + Poe = Revenge Death. Now, who will take Petunia when I’m gone?