Good Thing I’m a Supremely Confident Person

When one starts a blog, one knows that putting oneself out there is a risk. Am I as funny as I think I am? Am I bringing a unique voice to the debate? Will they like me out there on the Internets?

Then, about a minute into it, one decides that one does not really care what the rest of the world thinks.

One of my favorite blogs (Young House Love) had a post the other day called “Dealing With Criticism.” It was pretty interesting and helpful, particularly, if like those two, you have millions of eyes and hundreds of comments on your blog.

ThePoeLog is a slightly more modest proposition, but I went ahead and dug into the spam folder to see what I could find.

One of the great things about WordPress is their comment filter – all comments have to be approved before they are published. And a lot of really entertaining comments get caught in the drain-hair-catcher-net-thingy like the disgusting detritus they are.

"I've been reading your blog for a little while now, and I'm fairly sure I could do it better. If I wanted to."

And, well, while Young House Love had a lot of great advice about doing your own thing and ignoring the critics. But honestly, I find the foul comments HILARIOUS and worthy of sharing and laughing at.

For example, this recent comment caught my eye:

The next time I read a blog, I hope that it doesnt disappoint me as much as this one. I mean, I know it was my choice to read, but I actually thought youd have something interesting to say. All I hear is a bunch of whining about something that you could fix if you werent too busy looking for attention.

Wow. I’m now responsible for this person’s enjoyment of all future blogs. That is a huge responsibility! I’d like to say I plan to take this responsibility seriously, but…..I probably won’t.

As far as looking for attention? Guilty, as charged. I love attention. That’s why I have a blog. I like to brag to the world at large on how freaking awesome my life is.  Not really sure how that is considered a “bunch of whining about something that you could fix.” I’m not looking to fix my awesome life.

By the way, this comment was left on Jumping on the Latest Hollywood Trend, a satirical look at the Hollywood trend of adopting. No whining there as far as I can tell. Someone needs a little help with their cognitive reading skills.

Oh, and the comment was left by someone signed in as “hairstyles for thinning hair.”

Well, I guess we know who I won’t be ordering hair products from. Actually, I have gorgeous hair, a lot like this little girl here.

Fun fact: This girl – the naturally curly redhead girl with the crush on Charlie Brown – has a name: Frieda. AND she was first introduced in the Peanuts strip on my birthday, March 6!!! Other similarities: she’s vain (she won’t wear a cap because it would cover up her naturally curly hair),  she’s a chatterbox (according to Linus) and she has a cat named Faron.

THIS IS MY CARTOON DOPPELGANGER.

OK, so here’s another good one, this time, “Sgt. Grit” was responding to my post Knights of Mayhem: More Like Nights of Boredom.

You are an asshole. Watch the entire show if you are going to comment on it. I would like to say more with regard to your poorly written article, but I refuse to waste my time and energy on a low life piece of garbage. I hope you and your off spring contract a horrible disease and die and long, slow painful and lonely death.

HA! The venom! First, Sgt. Grit, if that is indeed your name, I did watch an entire episode, even though it pained me to do so. Honestly, I should have gotten a Nobel Peace Prize for that effort.

Second, a blog post is hardly “an article.” Even I know the difference.

Third, I have no offspring, nor do I plan to have any, so your evil curse is falling on barren ground. Sorry. Wasted breathe.

That’s it. The only two negative comments from the last six months. I found them very constructive and enlightening and I fully intend to change my wicked ways – JUST KIDDING.

It’s my blog….I’ll write about whatever the hell I want, whenever I want. Believe me, I can take it just as hard as I dish it. I’ve never been one to lose sleep over what other people think. I only lose sleep over planning the packing list for my next super awesome trip, or sharing the bed with my oversized cat.

"I'm also unimpressed by you. And your kitty kibble response time is atrocious."
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