Today is my 200th post. Pretty exciting stuff. But also, kind of intimidating. I mean, it needs to be meaningful, right? You only get one 200th post. Unless, of course, you start another blog. Then, I suppose, you would get a second shot at a 200th post.
Anyway, this is THIS blog’s one and only 200th post. And I want to turn down the lights, put on some smooth jazz, and send out a dedication. This post goes out to my schmoopies-for-life, XFE.
(said in a breathy DJ whisper) Boy, you know you’re fine. And, you know I will always love you. Without you, none of this (just look at all of THIS — *said while twirling around*) is possible.
Boy, I would have written you a song, like my girl Melissa Gorga over on Real Housewives of New Jersey, but since you have yet to build me a recording studio in my house, I did not write you a hit ballad similar to “How Many Times.”
Thank you Bravo, thank you.
But if I did, the lyrics would go like this:
How many times
Can I tell you we can’t have a kangaroo?
How many times
Can Petunia be mean to you?
How many times (x3)
Now I know
Dreams come true
Every night I pray for you
I love you (x3)
I really do
I love you (x3)
I really do.
How many times
Do you make fun of my soy saucing?
How many times
Will you remind me to engage in flossing? (WHAT? Rhyming with ‘saucing’ is hard, y’all!)
How many times (x3)
Anyway, repeat chorus, repeat refrain, ad nauseum. You get the idea.
Oh, further enhancing the romantic theme. We both got the same fortune in our fortune cookies the other night. (Good job there, fortune cookie company.) And basically, we’re both screwed since neither of us really has what the kids would call a “cheerful disposition.”
What are the chances of getting the same fortune at the same time?!? Coincidence? I think not!
It did seem quite momentous at the time! But then we figured the cookie factory just got lazy and that whole bag probably had the same fortune in every cookie.