In honor of Bow-Wow-Wow-Yippee-Yo-Yippee-Yay, I’ve decided to change my name. I, too, have been filled with the spirit of reggae (or, at least, a passing fondness of No Doubt) and henceforth, I shall be called, The Poe Lion.
(Cuba Gooding, take note. You might be needing to look into a little ol’name change yourself, sweet cheeks. And maybe a dash for the border and less legalistic environs.)
Proving that you can overdose on marijuana, my favorite Doggfather has pulled a Prince on us (we miss you, oh purple one) and gone from a former-Crip-professional-pimp-gangsta-rapper to a Rastafarian. OK, it’s not exactly like Prince, but I tend to lump all alternative naming together (Beyonce/Sasha Fierce; Garth Brooks/Chris Gaines; Sean Combs to…take your pick).
Dogg, nee Lion, explained his decision to reporters on Monday.
“I didn’t know that until I went to the temple, where the High Priest asked me what my name was, and I said, ‘Snoop Dogg.’ And he looked me in my eyes and said, ‘No more. You are the light; you are the lion.’ From that moment on, it’s like I had started to understand why I was there.”
Well, there was your first mistake: going to church. I avoid those places myself. So…why not Snoop Light? Or, Snoop Lite, as I would do.
He also claims to be the reincarnated Bob Marley, which seems a bit difficult to pull off since Marley died in 1981 and ol’ Calvin Broadus Jr. was born in 1971. So….what? He entered your body AFTER you were born? I thought reincarnation took place at like birth or something. Like, born, live, die, re-born. Isn’t that the cycle? And why Snoop Lion? Does this have something to do with the Lion King and therefore, the Circle of Life, ie; reincarnation?
Whoa. I just blew my own mind.
What I don’t understand is why Snoop didn’t go country when he had the chance? I mean, him and Willie Nelson both share a love of getting caught by the police, and they did make a country song together, called “Roll Me Up and Smoke Me When I Die,” a beautiful tribute to a certain illegal substance. Snoop’s name could have been Snoop Jackalope.