‘Best Funeral Ever?’ More Like Best Idea for a Reality TV Show Ever

Listen, I know I owe all of you a real post. I’ve even started a post on our last stop in Spain (the alluring San Sebastian). But it’s not ready, and I’m super-important and really busy, and it’s the holidays, and there’s lots of baking, and entertaining, and partying, and fancy dressing going on, and work is really busy this week, and I have to write like, 4 more articles today before I have to go to my 27th work-related holiday party.

I totally agree Grumpy Cat.
I totally agree Grumpy Cat.

Besides, there’s so, so much I love about this trailer for a new TLC show called, “Best Funeral Ever.”

  1. How wonderfully morbid is this?
  2. This funeral home is in Dallas. OF COURSE.
  3. Could this be the start of a new trend of Bereave-ality TV? (fingers crossed)

My friend Hilary sent me the link to this trailer and before I had even watched a single second of it, I wrote this to her:

Nooooo!!! I totally want to be on this show. Maybe I could play the role of sassy cadaver makeup artist, or crier-for-hire for funerals where they don’t really have a very good turnout. Or, maybe I could be the go-to funeral flower arranger, who’s designs just get bigger and better with each new gig.

Speaking of awesomely bad reality TV, two words: Amish. Mafia. It’s HORRIBLE. Like, Syfy movies horrible. Except, those movies know their horrible, but Amish Mafia has no idea.

Then I watched the trailer. Here was my response.

Crap. Just watched the promo. Clear this up for me….am I African American?

I sent that response over 30 minutes ago and have not heard back from Hilary. Is that confirmation that I am, in fact, qualified to appear on this show? Because I really, really think I”d be an excellent addition to the cast. I’d even bring my own hanky.

By the way, Phaedra Donkey Booty is going to be TICKED. OFF. that Bravo Andy did not come up with this amazing vehicle for her first.